I’m a very passionate person. Whenever I feel strongly about a topic, I don’t shut up about it and I let the world know just how strongly I feel. That’s just who I am. I mean, I have a damn blog where I pretty much tell the very detailed story of my life.
One thing I feel very strongly about is body positivity. For a while I claimed that I was body positive, but I was only fooling myself. I would say that I love my curves, but I would feel terrible about myself when I couldn’t fit into a certain size. It was until the last few months that I really feel body positive and really love my own body.
Last night, I was in the mall shopping for a new dress for an upcoming Atlantic City trip with some friends. The store I went to is one that I go to often, and I used to be a size medium there. The last year or so I’ve found myself going towards more of the large and extra large sizes, and of course I resorted to thinking I was gaining weight and felt terrible.
I have a problem when I shop. I go in for one specific thing, and always get sidetracked by something else that is not what I need. I swear, I’m like a little kid that sees something shiny and needs to run to it immediately. So, I walked into the dressing room with two dresses, a jacket, and a bodysuit.
The bodysuit was a size large, but looked like it should’ve been a small. I convinced myself that it would be fine. It was not fine.
I could barley get it over my chest, and if you think I was able to button it at the bottom, you are sadly mistaken. I looked in the mirror and started hysterically laughing. I looked somewhere in between someone who can’t let go of an item of clothing from their childhood and a cheap prostitute.
Now this is a huge deal for me. I was laughing. Not gonna lie, a few months ago I would be feeling disgusting about myself and be incredibly upset. So yes, this was a big step for me.
On the other hand…
Why the fuck is a size large so goddamn small? Why does it look more like a child’s large in a store that is geared towards teenagers and young adults like myself? This is why girls have body image issues. Because they see a larger size on a tag and get completely discouraged when it doesn’t fit them, or if they have to go up a size or two.
I can be two completely different sizes in different stores, that’s just how it is for me. In one store I could get a dress that is an extra large and in another I can get one that is a medium. I’ve accepted that and have accepted that the size on the tag doesn’t define who I am.
Not every girl feels that way though. Not every girl can see passed the size on the tag. I used to be that girl. I used to see an L or and XL and feel like I was so fat and hated myself. Now? I could give two shits whats on the tag. If I feel good, then I look good.
But to all of these clothing stores that seem to be forgetting what sizes are, or who maybe are just forgetting some fabric on their items…stop it. This is why so many girls have body issues ranging from mild to severe. It isn’t okay.
Confidence is sexy, ladies. And it shows. Own it.